#1 From: "Kevin Campbell" <firstname.lastname@example.org>
"I was inspired by the picture of the posed tortured guitarist to watch your
short video on how to suck, I mean "Grave". What a stupid picture! You guys
look like some 6th graders who just watched "The Crow" that are pissed off
at the world, and trying to squeeze their parents' souls into oblivion. Or
is that some new goth make-up kit he's reaching for? That song already
blows. Play something that has intelligence; and stop trying to be so "I'm
so dark, and life's so shitty, so buy my CD." And how can one seriously
define talent in that style of music? No one can, because there is none!
Where is the intellgence and musicality in using a WASHER as a pic, and
strumming mindless distorted chords over and over to your dark lost soul's
content. If someone wants to hear that crap, they can go out and bash
trashcan lids together. But it's not a trash can lid, it's a guitar, so USE
it. Do what ever it takes to get some inspiration, man....Listen to Hendrix
or some Clapton, but for the good of music as a whole, and not just for
your dark little scene, play music that sets you apart from all that
bullshit. So you missed the '80's by a decade and a half...yes, that's a sign."
#2 From: TeleGuy000@aol.com
Wow. My friend showed me your video, and it has easily as much inspiration
behind it as a dog taking a dump. Your music=dump. I think it must be a joke,
but you never know with all the new depressed, shitty, i'm-rich-for-playing-power-
chords-and-screaming-yet-i-hate-my-life bands out there. If you guys were trying
to make a joke, it was pretty funny, (i laughed throughout most of it), and if you
weren't, then it's just sad. I hope that you make more either way though, as they're
sure to give me and my buddies lots of enjoyment.
PS-i especially enjoyed the part with the washer. try something more outlandish next time."
#3 From : email@example.com
To : KauL
"The following message was sent to you from a visitor to your
page on MP3.com. MP3.com is not responsible for its content.
you guys are gay"
#4 Subject: Legal action.
From: "Eric Anderson" <GeorgeDubyah@dontmesswithtexas.com>
"I'm afraid that your band has infringed on several songs that I
copyrighted. I ended up copyrighting my horrible, untalented lyrics after
randomly writing them on a wall with a pen shoved between my ass cheeks.
You guys obviously have no talent if I was able to write the same lyrics
blindly with a pen between my ass cheeks. I have still opted to sue you
both for everything you are worth, just because you suck so fucking bad and
you both are a bunch of whiney pricks. I'll keep in touch."
+ LET THE NAPALM RAIN +