MORGAN
When you're ready, this is what I want you to do to me... (WHISPERS)

Morgan has lept up and wrapped her legs around Perry, urging him to perform the most filthy, wicked and sinful things to her. The exact nature, the exact words said are only known to Andrew Helm and Beth Davis. I fear this dirty secret will remain theirs alone, as Andrew simply laughed and said "I'll never tell you", when I begged to know.

Derek Prusak, the Director of Photography deftly captured their awkward distances and sexually charged action from every conceivable angle, take after take, nipple-tweak after nipple tweak.

Shooting in a disjointed sequence, we began with the breakup. Even knowing nothing of the story, I'm sure you can guess there's gonna be a break-up. And a violent one at that...

During the break-up, we filmed Morgan crushing Perry's manhood, again from every conceivable angle, take after take. Andrew (Perry) was berated, humiliated and dumped for hours. As if that weren't bad enough, Perry somehow enrages Morgan enough to make her hurl a beer bottle at him, before storming out. Knowing from rehearsals, Beth's (Morgan) bottle throw far exceeds the distance permitted by the U.N. But in this case, what Hans Blix doesn't know won't hurt him.

I could, however, hurt me.

So, here I am, across the room from Beth (Morgan), roughly where Perry would be, holding up a mattress, behind the camera, to catch the bottle. At some point in one particular take, I decide to duck down behind the mattress, for a reason I can't explain. Had I not, Morgan's air bourne weapon of mass destruction would have shattered on my forehead, most certainly giving me a concussion, and possibly seriously injuring me.

-- A CRASH --

as the bottle flew over me and hit the window behind me. We all hurried over to find an intact window and no bottle, anywhere in sight... The bottle-missle had, amazingly, struck the metal divider, not the glass, and had not broken, but fell down under Perry's bed, fully intact. The only casualty was a single, white plastic blind.